Week 4: Coffee Meets Bagel

My expression dealing with the annoying song and dance on dating apps.

Moral of the day: Online dating apps feel like a really bad part-time job, one that I don’t get paid for and isn’t that much fun.

Me. Today, 6:30 p.m.

Welp I got tired of Bumble. Eh. They seem so… boring. I do have some leftover Bumbles coming up, I think.

Uber Man

So this is hopeful. We connected on Bumble last Thursday I think it was. I haven’t written about him yet because ya know, Trivia Man happened Friday night 😉 and I went to visit my mama for Mother’s Day, then Bachelorette started and I watch that with daughter then a kick-ass concert with friends. No time for mens. He has texted me consistently. He really wanted to meet up over the weekend but I was busy.

Even though his profile says “Relationship,” he asked what I was looking for.

“Fun, flirting, a drink and see if there are sparks, maybe an FWB,” I replied. Just like my profile says. He liked the FWB so why does he have “Want a relationship.” Ugh.

We texted the normal boring shit you text on these things, blahhh.

Then he said a few days later, “So you said something about FWB?” with a winky emoticon.

“Yes,” I replied. “I believe I said: Fun, flirting, drinks, see if there’s a connection. Then maybe FWB.”

He said, “Yes ma’am. You did. There will be.”

When he texts, “Hey sexy,” I wonder if he has forgotten my name. Is that cynical?

He was at Crossfit. That sounds tasty right? He was very encouraging and detailed in answering questions about it as I’m interested, maybe, someday, in trying it. In the future ya know. After I’m fit. So I won’t die or be the worst person in class.

I said I would check it out and he said, “When are you going to check me out?”

I replied, “You have not invited me to check you out,” cuz he has not asked me out.

He said it was implied.

We are not having a great texting convo here. I am tired, lol.

“I meant a time lol,” I replied.

“O when r u free,” he texts. Yes he has o for oh and r for are and u for you. Ugh. Hate, triple hate.

I kinda forgot about him so hours later I apologized and he said no worries. I asked if he was coming to town this weekend.

He said, “Is that my invite?” That’s annoying.

Keep you updated.

Tantric Man

Supposed to meet him next week for a drink.

Old lawyer

I downloaded Coffee Meets Bagel and was asked out. By a 60-year-old. Okay I know I’m 54 but 60? Man I don’t know. In real life if I met someone it would be nothing but it seems another thing on the dating app. I have already said I’d go. Should I go? I mean maybe?

I’m a young 54. Hoppy Sporty Sport was ten years younger and could not keep up with me. Sigh.

He doesn’t look that hot either. Kind of sesame streetish.


So I already logged out of CMB and deleted the app. LOL.

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

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