Back-to-Back Tinder Dates

4:00 p.m. The Graphic Artist

I met the Artist at the same local restaurant that I had met Tantric Man at a week ago. I was trying to figure out which guy at the bar was him. Then I recognized his glasses. Either he has not updated his pictures over the 20-pound-weight-gain or perhaps he photo-shopped them as he is a graphic artist. For all that guys gripe on Tinder about women using filters, many of them post older pictures that don’t really show the truth. I still liked him and would have met him even if he had posted a current photo. It bothers me more because it’s dishonest. 

He has amazing blue eyes and seemed a little shy in person. It was a bit disconcerting to talk normally with him in a bar after having been so open about sex on Tinder. Because our conversation in real life wasn’t sexy. I mean I do understand you are looking eyeball to eyeball at someone and you can’t just throw a, “I wanna stick my tongue inside you.” That would be weird, whereas on messaging, eh normal. At one point though I pulled his shirt to move him forward and kiss him when I was illustrating my move with Coffee Meets Bagel. I think he liked it. 

We had a wonderful conversation about being former religious people, he Disciple of Christ, me Southern Baptist. He was a great listener and it was truly fun talking with him. We talked over an hour and it was time to go on to other adventures.

Even though we were in the middle of a sidewalk at 5:30 in the afternoon we kissed goodbye. Quite a bit. We both were holding back, or I was anyway and I sensed he was, which makes sense because who wants to see middle-aged people making out in broad daylight?

Let’s be honest. No one does.

Now faithful readers know I have done this several times: Coffee Meets Bagel on the sidewalk, Hinge at the concert, the Artist and the Marine. (keep reading). I balance wanting to kiss someone with the possible “get a room” or nasty looks I will get.

We will definitely hang out again. He knew I was headed to another date.He, and Bumble Cyclist and maybe Prince A (I can’t remember what I’ve told him), know about a lot of my journey so far. They find it sexy, supposedly. It’s super refreshing to completely do my thing. I do have a fear of someone getting their feelings hurt or calling me a whore. But I mean I am. Wait I looked that up. A whore gets paid. I’m not geting paid. Slut. I’m a slut. Right? So who fucking cares? 

I always tell them I’m not going to get serious and I don’t want that. I suppose it is their problem then. So far no one cares or they “unmatch.” Fine with me. 

6:00 p.m. Well, well, well the Anomaly: A Liberal Marine 

I went to our meeting location, got a patio table, and called my mom because the Anomaly had said he’d be late. I was on the phone and see a man being shown to a table who looked like it could possibly be him. He texted and said he’d feel like a tool if he just walked past me. He had. I said goodbye to mom who amazingly thought it was cool I was on a date. I think she did anyway because she didn’t say it wasn’t good. And she would have. I think. 

He needs some help with choosing shirts. It swallowed him. Also he could have great hair. And he is not wise in his choice of glasses. Underneath the floppy plaid shirt, Sports Clips haircut and horrible glasses he was very cute.

Also he’s fucking interesting as hell. He’s not only been a marine but is a history fanatic and is extremely well-read in this area. I am not but he was giving me titles to read and talking about when he got to go see Rachel Maddow. He understands what it is like to be from a conservative place and not be that way anymore. He likes travel, has gone to Europe a few times and we talked about hiking. A close friend is a married lesbian and set up his Tinder for him. 

From our messaging I was worried I might catch feelings and need to only have the one date but I think it will be fine. It could be an awesome friends with benefits situation if he doesn’t catch feelings, which could easily happen I think. I had told him in messaging before we met that I was not going to be exclusive with anyone for at least a year. He found the honesty “hot” and said he was not a jealous person. We shall see. 

He talked. A lot. But it was interesting and I laughed. Sometimes he was a great listener and sometimes he wasn’t at all. However he was so nervous. It was sweet actually how nervous he was. I’ve never seen that much sweat on someone’s face who wasn’t mowing the lawn or something. I told Prince A this when he texted just now asking about my weekend and he asked if I’m intimidating and should he be “shittin’ kittens”? I don’t think so. However I did channel my inner slut that night upon reflection. I had my cute chunky heels with shorts and a lingerie top on. I had the good Victoria Secret bra that lifts the girls up for some fresh air. They like to be out and about sometimes.

We talked, had drinks, ordered dinner and he got me a tequila shot. I invited him to come back to my place and we went to catch the streetcar. While we were waiting, we made out. He told me I had soft lips, which he repeated until it became a little joke, all the way through to the morning.

Yes he spent the night. 

Yes I was sorry that he did as I didn’t sleep because I can’t sleep with someone new. I like my own bed to my own self. But a storm had moved in and was raging while we were getting busy. He said, “Please don’t make me go out in the rain.” So I didn’t. The only benefit to this situation was the morning sex that occurred that almost made the no sleep okay. But not really. 

He also liked my butt. And boobs. He was very complimentary. Tantric Man had mentioned my butt too. I think it’s too big myself.

Oh wait, you want to know about the sex?

The marine is the best kisser I’ve ever been with in my whole life. He did everything right and I think our next time together will be even better because I “caught” his nervousness once we got to my place. He knew about the clitoris unlike so many of my dates.

Unfortunately sex still wasn’t as good as it was with Cranky Narcissist, damn it to hell.

Is it possible that a penis can be a certain shape to fit just right in a way that makes you come? Or is it more of a position thing? I don’t know. 

But I look forward to finding out.  

One thought on “Back-to-Back Tinder Dates

  1. Yes: “Yes I was sorry that he did as I didn’t sleep because I can’t sleep with someone new. I like my own bed to my own self.” Me too. Loving your journey that I am binge reading!


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