Saturday night shenanigans by myself in a different city

I can meet people out by myself and have a fucking blast.

Saturday night, 9:30 p.m.

I’ve been at a conference in another city for a few days and was checking Tinder but didn’t really think anything would come of it. I had lots of friends to hang out with also at the conference. I went out to dinner and drinks with them Thursday and Friday and had some low key fun. I was flirting with a guy at one point then my friend asked him his details and he was married so I backed off. Not interested in that.

Friday I matched with a man who sounded interesting. He messaged immediately saying he’d just gotten back from a trip to South America and would be bartending which was his side gig. He invited me to come to the bar and he’d give me free drinks and flirt. This sounded fun but I didn’t make it Friday.

Saturday I had dinner plans with a couple of friends who had to head the airport early. I told the bartender I might make it and he put my name and three friends down to get wristbands. My friends wanted to get some BBQ so we ubered to this place on the edge of nowhere and the Uber pulls into a gentleman’s club parking lot. We were a bit disconcerted by this and I asked if the BBQ place was inside the club. He laughed and pointed to this tiny shack at the corner of the parking lot. Now anyone who knows BBQ knows that tiny shacks are the best. It was good but not the best I’ve had. It was still fun. We asked the driver if we were safe before we got out of the car. He said yes. As long as we didn’t walk anywhere. LOL. So we ate and got an Uber.

Now I cajoled these sweet friends who had to leave for the airport at 5:30 a.m., into going for one drink at this bar with me so I could meet the bartender. Such sweeties. I told them I’d leave with them if I wasn’t comfortable but I’d stay if I was. I knew they were hoping I’d come back but they were so awesome to come.

So I’m thinking he was making it sound special so I’d come because there was no guest list or wristbands lol. He immediately set us up with three drinks and was a great conversationalist asking my friends and I questions. It was really dead but it was only 7:30 or so. They had their one drink and I felt very comfortable and wasn’t ready to go back so they left.

The bartender and I got to talk a lot. He’s very interesting. He had just gotten back from Peru. He has tattoos on his fingers, the backs of his hands to his arms all the way up on his neck. It was weird how comfortable I felt with him. We talked for another hour and then some people started coming in. At one point I went to the restroom. When I came out he was in the hall and we kissed. He knew how to kiss, soft with a little tongue. Mmmm.

The groups that came in at this point had been to a concert that had just ended. A woman was standing near my barstool when I was coming back from the bathroom and as I scooched in she apologized. I said she was fine and we started talking. She was extremely outgoing and talkative. She introduced me to all her friends and then they just hung out with me for the next few hours. They were in their 30s except one guy who was 42. We had fun just shooting the shit. Then we all went to dance with a 70-year-old grandmother who was sassy as all hell. So much fun! The grandma was trying to show me how to do a hip roll. I sucked at it but I gave it a go.

I began to notice that the 42-year-old was watching me a lot and then my new friend said I should hang out him and how nice he was. He was nice, very nice. He’s a longshoreman and showed me pictures of what he’d done that day. He bought me a drink and hung pretty close but they all were. I was having a blast talking and laughing with them. I began to wonder how this was all going to go down as I realized I had two men interested in taking me home that night.

Well it was interesting. Now a fact I haven’t mentioned is that the bartender is poly. I didn’t know that before I got there but that makes things easier. We talked a lot about it and he gave me some resources I’m going to read. He thinks I’d make a great poly. I’m not sure. So I knew that he wasn’t freaking out at seeing this other guy flirt with me. He was pretty busy bartending now that more people were there.

We reach the end of the night and the milennials/Gen x-ers wanted me to come with them, to get together with the longshoreman. We kissed at the bar but I wasn’t going to go home with anyone. I was feeling too drunk.

The bartender and the longshoreman both walked me outside lol. It was funny. The longshoreman wanted to be with me but also wanted to make sure I was safe. I kissed him goodbye and they left, fairly disappointed in me I think.

The bartender got an Uber for me and I told him that he didn’t have to do that. We made out while waiting for the car to show up. He had a close shaven head, then the tattoos then these great biceps. So this was funny. I had not communicated very well because the car pulls up and I get in and turn to tell him goodbye and he’s getting ready to get in the car. I tell I have a roomie at the hotel and he can’t come and I feel terrible. He kinds of laughs and waves goodbye and then texts that he read the situation wrong. I tell him he didn’t, that I was totally into him but we had to share rooms. He said he knew it was unusual to go to someone’s place the first meeting but he’d have invited me. I just wasn’t feeling going to someone’s place. I was tired and drunk and just wanting to crash in my own bed. So I did.

I got back and considered throwing up but it passed and I got to bed about 2:45 a.m. Partay- girl. I felt like shit on toast the next morning but that’s another story. I did end up going out with the bartender today.

Photo by mentatdgt on

2 thoughts on “Saturday night shenanigans by myself in a different city

  1. I’ve mentioned poly to you before too. Check out this article if you want to know more. I’m guessing the resources he mentioned are probably the same that I did (The Ethical Slut and Franklin Veaux’s More Than Two website). You are in the same mindset as poly, so I don’t see why it would bother you? – this one really delves into the philosophy of polyamory


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