Zen Man Date 2: It’s cuffing season bitches

Fuck. I really like this guy.

Saturday, 10:00 p.m.

My first date with Zen Man was Wednesday for Happy Hour. It lasted five hours. So that bodes well. He asked me out immediately for the weekend and I said I’d love to. He texted Friday asking what I’d like to do, that we could do whatever I wanted, go somewhere in the city or have cocktails at his place.

I never do this but hey, it’s cuffing season and I feel like cuddling. And Zen Man is very cuddly. So I said I’d like to come to his place. I offered to make Chicken Fettuccine Alfredo but he didn’t want to “share me with the kitchen,” which I thought was a sweet way to say he wanted to spend time with me. It’s funny though that when I shared that with two friends, one a millennial and one a Gen X, they both wrinkled their noses. I find it interesting that when I share something I think is sweet, inevitably someone thinks it is weird. I’m a fan of sweet romantic texts but I think they think the texts are fake or manipulative or something. Each to his own I suppose.

I’d had a super busy day of yoga and a six-hour meeting and then happy hour with some friends so I was tired but I rallied and took a quick shower, wore my vintage polyester shirt which I thought he’d like since he’s a mid-century buff. He asked me to bring old-fashioned makings, that he had the whiskey, so I brought bitters, oranges, and the big square ice cubes.

He was freaking cute as shit when I got there showing me the house he is re-doing. He’s doing it all himself which is sexy to me. His enthusiasm and energy for it are also. I made the drinks and we started watching “2001: A Space Odyssey.” I had never seen it and he is a FAN, as in he knows all the cool facts about it. He even has a representation of the monolith in his living room. As I said, a FAN. We are sitting on the couch watching it, sipping our Old-Fashioneds, and he is telling me some things about it but not too much because he “doesn’t want to ruin it.” We hold hands. Swoon.

I probably should have kissed him right when I walked in but I didn’t and then I just was going with the flow to see what would happen. We watched the movie, he ordered pizza and we held hands or cuddled. He said after we “met HAL” we’d go listen to records if I wanted. I wanted. So we move to his den, a circa 1972 den. It’s still in progress but it has a great sound system, a mid-century couch and a fake fireplace. I felt like I was in high school you guys. We were listening to records and talking and cuddling and I’m wondering if he is ever going to kiss me again. We did this for an hour. It was nice actually.

Then I began touching his hair and he stood up and held out his hand and we slow danced and made out. Swoon again folks. From there we very slowly made our way to removing items of clothing, paying attention to each part. Every time a record would end he’d go flip it or put a new one. I didn’t mind. I forgot to tell you that his obsession with Space Odyssey is eclipsed by his knowledge and fascination with music. He chose Billy Joel’s “The Stranger” for booty time. We got to “She’s Always A Woman To Me” when I was on top staring into his eyes.

He really likes me and ditto, I like him. I like that he listened to my 2019 Spotify Top Play list and texted me about different songs as he did. I like that he has friends that he adores and he is there for them, fully. I like that he has the passions of music, and his home, and sci-fi and the 70s. He’s a good storyteller and makes me laugh. He’s quirky as all hell.

The first time with anyone is a bit awkward and this was no different. I look forward to round two to see how it will go. I had considered spending the night but wanted to go home to my own bed.

I asked him if he’d like to come in and see my place and go to dinner on Sunday evening. He said he would. It was now 1:30 in the morning so it was early Sunday morning. Something he had mentioned to me was that women always wanted to be “friends” with him. He said it in a funny way and I thought of the DJ and how I’d said that to him sort of. So as I left he said he’d look forward to seeing me but that if I changed my mind and wanted to be his friend or had something to do he’d be fine. He said he enjoyed his own company. Now I believe him but the Cranky Narcissist used to say that so much at the beginning.

He had a best friend coming over to watch the football game. I checked the game time and it was going to be too late to meet tonight so I offered Monday. He’s coming in then.

I’m at a coffee shop writing right now. I was with people from 8 a.m. until 1:30 a.m. yesterday, except for driving. I even had brunch with my daughter this morning but I’m feeling a bit lonely today. Honestly I’d kinda like to be cuddling on the couch with him. But I’m gonna go home and clean a bit and do laundry and do some homework. It will be okay. I have a book talk with friends on Tuesday, a date with Tantric Man Thursday, and a friends dive bar crawl on Friday. Sundays have always, always been hard for me. If I have stuff planned all day I worry I won’t be rested for Monday. But if I’m chill and by myself I’m sad and lonely.

What would a “perfect” Sunday be? Early morning sex, coffee and breakfast in bed watching CBS Sunday morning, then get out of the house depending on the season: bike, hike, kayak, museum, movie, read books at a coffee shop or park. Back home for a nap and sex if we didn’t do it in the morning, or maybe again. Dinner with friends, switching houses every week for who hosts but everyone bringing things to share.

yeah. That’s my goal.

One last thing. I have not told him that I’m not exclusive. I’m going to talk to him tomorrow night about it. He has said he is deleting his Tinder because I’m so great. I said he didn’t need to do that. He said he couldn’t keep up with more than one woman. He says I’m great. We’ll see what he thinks about the #yearofsluttery.

Photo by Flickr on Pexels.com

8 thoughts on “Zen Man Date 2: It’s cuffing season bitches

    1. I’ve been stressing on that a bit. I don’t feel ready for a serious relationship in the way that I’ve done things before which is head over heels spend every spare moment together kind of thing. I could be ready for a slow and steady thing. But when I think about just dating one person I feel a bit panicky. I don’t want to feel trapped, nor am I ready to let go of some of my regular dates just yet. However, we are ten days in so it feels rushed to even think of this yet.

      Liked by 1 person

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